What Superman Does In His Spare Time
Sometimes I have to emphasize to my non-reporter friends that I do, indeed, have a real job. Sure, I don't have the same hours from one day to another, and regularly sleep in until 10 or work until 11 at night. I can pretty much show up and leave whenever I want/need, and I do a lot of crazy, fun stuff for my job.
It is still a job, however, as the rest of you writing hacks are well aware. For the readers out there that don't cover a beat (which I think is a minority) I thought I'd throw together a list of the pros and cons of being a reporter, in no particular order.
PRO #1: There's always updated reading material in the office's bathroom.
CON #1: It's always information you've either written yourself, or heard your friends talk about.
PRO #2: You can work (or not work) basically any time of the day you choose.
CON #2: The people you need to call for work (sources), well most of them are on a 9-to-5 schedule. If you want them to talk to you, guess when they're going to call you back.
PRO #3: You get to meet some really interesting people. I've interviewed a blind toy maker, a presidential candidate, rock stars, and even zombies.
CON #3: They're not all that interesting. I've also interviewed a woman who grew a pineapple in her living room, for a real news story. I'm not kidding.
PRO #4: Usually as a reporter you'll end up on good terms with the local police and fire department, which can come in extremely handy when you lock your keys in your car behind city hall after a council meeting on deadline. Or so I've heard.
CON #4: If you get caught doing something you shouldn't within your coverage area, odds are the competition (if they don't like you) will pick up on it and slap your name in their right-to-know section. In other words, don't live in the area you cover.
PRO #5: From reading police reports, you know the parts of town where you shouldn't park your car at night.
CON #5: As a grown man, you're now afraid of the dark.
PRO #6: If you're lucky, you can work from your own home.
CON #6: It's hard to get work done at home when HBO is having another Star Wars marathon. And there's laundry to do. And oh yeah, you're cell phone bill will be outrageous.
PRO#7: You can take hour-plus lunches the day after deadlines.
CON#7: You work 12-hour days and don't eat lunch the day of deadlines.
PRO#8: Once you've been on your beat awhile, people start calling you up with story ideas.
CON #8: Once you've been on your beat awhile, people start calling you up with story ideas. All the time. About their cat show.
PRO #9: As a reporter, you have easy access to public records. If you have a blind date with a public employee, you can find out how much she makes before you go out.
CON #9: As you're a reporter, odds are she'll have to pick up the tab at dinner.
PRO #10: Sometimes you get thank-you notes or other letters of gratitude from readers, or story subjects, thanking you for doing a good job.
CON #10: If you happen to spell a kid's name wrong in a high school sports or graduation story, you will receive 500 angry phone calls, emails, faxes, letter bombs, telegrams, smoke signals and telepathic memos from a legion of angry parents. Hell hath no fury like a soccer mom scorned.
It is still a job, however, as the rest of you writing hacks are well aware. For the readers out there that don't cover a beat (which I think is a minority) I thought I'd throw together a list of the pros and cons of being a reporter, in no particular order.
PRO #1: There's always updated reading material in the office's bathroom.
CON #1: It's always information you've either written yourself, or heard your friends talk about.
PRO #2: You can work (or not work) basically any time of the day you choose.
CON #2: The people you need to call for work (sources), well most of them are on a 9-to-5 schedule. If you want them to talk to you, guess when they're going to call you back.
PRO #3: You get to meet some really interesting people. I've interviewed a blind toy maker, a presidential candidate, rock stars, and even zombies.
CON #3: They're not all that interesting. I've also interviewed a woman who grew a pineapple in her living room, for a real news story. I'm not kidding.
PRO #4: Usually as a reporter you'll end up on good terms with the local police and fire department, which can come in extremely handy when you lock your keys in your car behind city hall after a council meeting on deadline. Or so I've heard.
CON #4: If you get caught doing something you shouldn't within your coverage area, odds are the competition (if they don't like you) will pick up on it and slap your name in their right-to-know section. In other words, don't live in the area you cover.
PRO #5: From reading police reports, you know the parts of town where you shouldn't park your car at night.
CON #5: As a grown man, you're now afraid of the dark.
PRO #6: If you're lucky, you can work from your own home.
CON #6: It's hard to get work done at home when HBO is having another Star Wars marathon. And there's laundry to do. And oh yeah, you're cell phone bill will be outrageous.
PRO#7: You can take hour-plus lunches the day after deadlines.
CON#7: You work 12-hour days and don't eat lunch the day of deadlines.
PRO#8: Once you've been on your beat awhile, people start calling you up with story ideas.
CON #8: Once you've been on your beat awhile, people start calling you up with story ideas. All the time. About their cat show.
PRO #9: As a reporter, you have easy access to public records. If you have a blind date with a public employee, you can find out how much she makes before you go out.
CON #9: As you're a reporter, odds are she'll have to pick up the tab at dinner.
PRO #10: Sometimes you get thank-you notes or other letters of gratitude from readers, or story subjects, thanking you for doing a good job.
CON #10: If you happen to spell a kid's name wrong in a high school sports or graduation story, you will receive 500 angry phone calls, emails, faxes, letter bombs, telegrams, smoke signals and telepathic memos from a legion of angry parents. Hell hath no fury like a soccer mom scorned.
Labels: trade secrets
posted by Merlin at 5:40 PM
2 Comments:
I love these! Well done and so true
i also enjoyed:)
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