Turnover from the Bottom of the Totem Pole

So we're getting ready to send off yet another one of our mercurial reporters in a couple hours. Jack is leaving us for the greener pastures of Cincinnati, far from the flatlands of the central Ohio news front. As I said yesterday, may the wind always be at yer back, Jack.

I haven't been here long, but there's been a lot of faces coming and going in the past few months. Three cheers for me, I don't feel like the new guy anymore! Though new-guy-mentality worked well for me, I had more incentive to do a better job. Now I'm feeling a little more anemic about the whole information gathering process. The stories will come, I suppose.

I have been formally challenged to a karaoke showdown. Being the newcomer, I have boasted of my talents, and office heavyweight Garth has taken notice, and seeks to reassert his dominance. The grounds have been chosen and terms agreed upon, so tonight I go to seek my fortune and glory as the reigning barroom hero of my news room. A quote comes to mind: "It's a funny thing, being taken under the wing of a dragon ... It's warmer than you'd think."

I will have to bust out such tried-and-true songs as Kenny Rogers' Gambler, a barrage of Neil Diamond, and of course if I'm deep enough in my cups, Metallica's 'Whiskey in the Jar.' If these don't leave Garth sufficiently reeling, I may have to drop the acapella-bomb called the Scotsman Song. I am savagely afraid I will get too drunk and do a solo version of the traditional Irish song 'Paddy's Lamentation,' which I once did on stage in a bar for my friend's birthday present, only to be met by a silent, sullen crowd with violence in their eyes. I haven't returned to Casa Cantina since.

Wish me luck, that I might dethrown the king of Journey.